COLD
by eyes101
Summary: Battler learns the hard way to never sin against the witch of Miracle's. This is for Renahh chen. Battler/Ronove and a little Bern/Lambda for me. I could not help myself. enjoy


**This is a one shot dedicated to Renahh chen for putting up with me. It is a gift and I like this paring enough to say screw it this is for you Renahh chen. The OTP you love so much. Also there isn't nearly enough stories for Umineko and Higurashi.**

**So without further a due here is some fluffy Battler/Ronove!**

COLD.

It must of been about one am. And BATTLER the **Endless Sorcerer. **Had a slight problem he Could Not Sleep.

It had all started that afternoon. He had been bored out of his mind since he and Beato had gotten into a argument about how Beato had stolen his snacks.

So he was grumpy and hungry. Even the vibrant colour of gold that seemed to radiate around him had faded slightly.

So he had gotten up to go find something sweet to cheer him up. Chocolate makes you happy~

So he had rushed to the kitchen. And had found no one there.

That meant no one to make him anything. He groaned but started to root around the kitchen. All he found was flour, teabags, bags of sugar, eggs. and basically bits and pieces that he him self could not do anything with due to his lack lustre cooking skills. (just ask Rudolf. It was a dark, dark day)

In any case he was desperate so he went to his last chance; the fridge.

He opened it inside was meats and vegetables and some.. Plumb.. Pudding? Right at the back of the fridge. He rejoiced at the find. His hunger clearly got the better over his logic and common sense.

OXOXOX

A few minutes later he was quite satisfied. Empty bowl of pudding sitting on the table his steaming hot cup of tea had cooled to his tastes as he gleefully sipped it.

Happiness hummed off around him. He didn't expect it but that plumb pudding had been nice. Very nice. He wouldn't mind having it again. But for now he was content.

That was, until he got a kick to the face.

"URMPH.,," He grunted as he was launched across the room. He rolled for a few seconds. Before sliding across the hard floor.

"Ow.. That hurt!" He groaned as he wiped the blood from his nose. He clenched his fists and scowled horribly. "What in the hell! Was THAT for?"

He came face to face with a rather peeved Lambdadelta. Peeved being a nice way to put it. Her face literally screamed mass murder and her mouth was pulled into the most ghastly expression Battler had ever witnessed.

He unintentionally recoiled at the look she was giving him. Her black gloves were creased from the strain of her fists clenching harshly, her nails must have been digging into her skin horribly and her hands shook in rage.

"..How.. Dare. You."

How dare he? How dare he what?

"How. Dare. You. Steal Bern's **favourite** plumb pudding!"

Bern? As in Bernkastel. Battler's face went from pained, to confused, to absolute terror in a about 1.25 seconds as his brain finally pieced together. He didn't know many people who ate plumb pudding. Maybe two or three.

He remembered Lambdadelta boasting about how 'Her' Bern could be tamed if you gave her some and that she enjoyed to have it while reading a good mystery novel and having a nice cup of 'dried plum, black tea; the kind that comes at two-hundred yen a pack.'

She also put in some extra more 'juicy' stuff that Bern did while in a good mood. But Battler made sure to ignore that part for the sake of his well-being, he was sure Bernkastel would slice his ears off, and feed them to her kitties.

"Battler. Do you remember what I said I'd do if you ever upset Bern."

All Battler could do was hope for mercy.

"For that. I hope you understand why I have to PUNISH you!"

"H-hold on a second.. I-it was pudding.. I'm sorry I was hungry. Look I said I'm sorry. Wait what are you doin- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

OXOXOXO

Any way that was why at one am he was in bed buried under ten blankets.

Lambda had 'turned off the heating' you could say.

Only for him though everyone else was fine. Then she had given him a nasty slap and walked off saying that she wouldn't reverse it till he had gotten Bern another pudding, and knelt before her licking the floor, begging for forgiveness.

And Battler didn't want to do that. His good mood from earlier had dissolved and he was now laying in bed freezing cold!

The cold was getting unbearable, like his body was rejecting heat.

He groaned, and moved around bunching the covers up around him.

Then he did the only think he could think of.

Call for Ronove

The man appeared in a burst of golden butterflies.

"Yes Battler-sama."

"Ronove. Do something about this. Seriously I'm actually freezing inside my own body."

The demon nodded "As you wish. Battler-sama."

Battler nodded in relief. Ronove was so reliable. He would sort out this dilemma.

For a few moments, Battler rested his eyes, safe in the knowledge of Ronove solving his problem.

He felt something shift. His covers? And felt his bed dip. Someone was climbing into his bed. His eyes shot open like his eyelids were plastered wide open. His eyes shot around. And he felt a pair of warm arms wrap around him raking over his stomach. A flat and lean body pressed against his back.

Wholy crap!

"R-Ronove? Wh-what the **hell** do you think you are doing?"

"I am following Battler-sama's orders. To 'do something about the cold'."

Battler's eyes widened as Ronove tightened his arms around him. "B-but this is not what I meant.." her squeaked out.

"Battler-sama did not give any precise orders." He breathed heavily onto Battler's neck. Whose cheeks flared up.

"W-Well this is not what I was looking for!"

Battler struggled for a short while until he was facing Ronove. Unfortunately for him his struggling had caused Rononve to pull him closer. There was now no air between their bodies and Battler had to turn his face so that they didn't bump lips.

Battler blushed harder at the feel of breath and the light brush of lips on his cheek. Battler pushes on his shoulders.

"Lemme go." His blush is now up to his ears as her feels Ronoves warm breathily sigh, against his cheek.

"But Battler-sama it is working is it not? You feel slightly warmer, and there is nothing I can directly do. This is Lady Labdadelta's magic and I am a mere demon."

"EVE- even so.. I.." He felt Ronove's hands trail the edge of his t-shirt before slipping under it.

"Battler-sama. For the sake of warmth, it would be easier if we both had our clothes off."

Battler blanched. Before a delicious red colour took over his body.

"I-I.."

It was too late Ronove had sat up. And pulled his t-shirt over his head. The warm yellow form the dim candles in Battler's room. Illuminated his figure and defined every muscle. It made his blue eyes glimmer mysteriously.

He then bent down and took hold of the startled Battler's t-shirt, and lifted it over his head. A slight smile appeared on his face, before he settled down again, their bodies pressing together.

Battler Couldn't help but notice every muscle movement, as they rippled under the butlers skin. Ronoves arms wrapped tightly around his body. Skin against skin, chest against chest.

Battler couldn't help but think how warm it was. He unconsciously snuggled deeper into the embrace and pressed his head against the furniture's.

They lay like that for a few moments in piece, before Ronove's hands started to wonder across his back.

"Do not worry Battler-sama. It is only a massage."

That's right a massage.

Battler didn't mind as the mans hands became bolder pressing into his back making him groan in pleasure.

At one point Ronove's hand pressed up and along his spine. The action made Battler grunt and arch into Ronove.

Battler's hands tightened around the demons back. His eyebrows clenched together pleasurably. He swear he didn't mean to but he grinded against Ronove. And a small. "..Ah.." came out of his mouth.

Ronove's hand slipped downward to his pyjama bottoms, and slipped under caressing is hips and pulling him in urging him on.

Battler's blue eyes cracked open and desire shone through. Finally his arousal took over and he rolled Ronove on top.

They looked into each others eyes for a few seconds at Battler's silent agreement. Ronove began edging down Battler's pyjama bottoms.

Then that all too familiar voice echoed through the air.

"Battler~! Bern said that if you apologised now~ you wouldn't have to lick the floor you could just kis-"

Lambdadelta appeared in a burst of golden butterflies, dragging Bern through holding happily on to her hand. At the sight before her she froze. As did Berkastel. Their eyes wide. that's right even Bernkastel's.

"W-what you guys doing?" Lambdadelta asked deadpan.

Battler was sitting in a provocative position, Ronove above him his hands twisted around the waist of Battlers pyjama bottoms, that had been pulled down to his thighs. Both had their t-shirts off and were breathing heavily.

For a few moments everything was quiet. That was before Bernkastel stepped forward. She uncharacteristically held onto Lambdadelta's hand happily, she swung it playfully and leant on her shoulder.

This made Lambdadelta blush happily and smile at her, scene before her forgotten. Bern observed the scene with quiet amusement. Before leaning and pecking Lambda on the cheek. Then whispered into her ear, Thanking her for dragging her there.

Then a large shit eating grin made its way to her face. She turn to the scene on the bed.

"Ehehehehe Thanks for the apology Baaattllllerrrrrr."

She then spun on her heels, still holding onto Lambdadelta's hand who looked like the happiest person in the world. Before disappearing in a cloud of butterflies.

"N-NO! WAIT THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU THIIIIINKKKK" Battler screamed after them. He shot up off the bed. Screaming. Before disappearing in a puff.

On the bed the demon sighed. He looked over to where Battler's t-shirt lay and picked it up. "Well that was fun. Pukukuku."

OXOXOXOX

That day Battler learned something.

**Never, Never sin against the witch of miracles.**

OXOXOXOX

**This as I said at the top dedicated to Renahh chen for filling my mind with Lambda/Bern goodness it only seemed right to give back and write about renahh chen's favourite pairing HEHEHEHEHE**

**Lol ****And Battler is fun to bully. I couldn't resist som Lambda/Bern somewhere in there soooo lol any way hope u enjoyed **

**R&R **


End file.
